Moses Bulamu

By Moses Bulamu

As men, we’re often told to push through, to be strong, and to keep moving forward. The voices in our heads echo the societal expectations: “Move it, move on.” But what about when we need to pause, reflect, and recharge? How do we balance the demands of our daily lives with our own mental well-being?

The Rev. Dr. Kimberly’s words resonate deeply: “the yearning for peace within as a reward to self.” But how do we reward ourselves when we’re constantly striving to meet others’ expectations? We celebrate our successes on the surface, but beneath the façade, we’re exhausted, resentful, and doubting ourselves.

In Uganda, the penal code may presume us to be of sound mind, but society often has a different yardstick. We’re branded as insane if our mental health is questionable. The pressure to keep up appearances is suffocating, and we often find ourselves trapped in a cycle of self-doubt and poor self-esteem.

So, how do we break free from this cycle? How do we prioritize our mental health and find a balance between our work, societal expectations, and personal well-being? It’s time for us to redefine what it means to be a man, to be strong, and to be successful. It’s time to prioritize our mental health, to seek help when we need it, and to support each other in our journeys.

Finding a Balance

To enrich our mental health, we need to recognize the societal expectations that weigh us down, prioritize self-care and self-compassion, seek help when we need it without fear of judgment, and redefine what it means to be strong and successful.

Let’s reflect on the activities we do out of obligation or pressure. What are the things we do because we feel we have to, rather than because we want to? You and I must take a step back and examine the things we do under little or no pressure.

Taking children to school? Visiting children in school? Shopping for groceries? Branching off at Hajjati for steamed plantain? Is it the Mulokony you crave for? Or the gossip on politics and your favorite English Premiership club? I know of some men who drive to Namawojjolo market on the highway to Jinja City so they can eat that roasted chicken in peace. In my previous writings, I’ve referred to this as a form of “medication”.

By doing so, we can break free from the cycle of exhaustion and self-doubt. We can find peace within, reward ourselves for our worth, and live a more authentic, balanced life. It’s time for us to take control of our mental health and redefine what it means to be a man in Uganda.